I found this interesting website about married priests. There was a time when I thought being a priest might be a great vocation. One of my high school teachers never called me by my name, always referring to me as "my theologian." But I was not willing to forego having a wife, children and other descendents.
There is some scriptural support for the position that celibacy can be good. But I don't agree with people who construe the Bible to dictate that priests must not marry. It is true that a person who can be content leading a celibate life will be able to avoid certain distractions, but those distractions, it turns out, can actually drive people out of the clergy.
In the case of Michael Baker, who chose pre-teen boys as his sex partners, being driven from the clergy was a good thing. Though he never touched me (he had a steady "boyfriend" my age when I was in fourth grade), I feel rather betrayed by this asshat. I actually went to confession and said "Bless me, Father, for I have sinned" to a guy who was raping little boys my age.
In the case of Michael Nocita, it is really unfortunate. Outwardly, Father Nocita was the single best priest I ever met -- charismatic, caring, able to relate to young people like me. He eventually left the cloth and married. It is a shame he was not able to stay and still maintain a family. About all I know now about Father Nocita is that he is running a business in LA, and is, apparently, a good friend of Dennis Prager.
If priests could marry, more Catholic men would consider the priesthood. Fewer pedophiles would do the same. And priests would have fuller richer lives. If I had a vote, I'd vote for letting priests marry.
=========================
Update 2012:
There are no words sufficient to describe how embarrassed I feel for having written this post in 2005. Regarding Michael Nocita, I really had no idea. I would never have believed it had someone told me in 1981, 1982, 1983. Some of the comments just blew me away, even more so when I learned that they were people I knew and liked, and it pains me to know what I now know about him and them.
There have been new developments in the law since these incidents occurred, and remarkably, some of the women who were abused by priests even back in the 1980s may still have valid claims. I've spoken at length with some of the lawyers who are successfully bringing these cases, and they've achieved some impressive results, including cases for my own friends and clients. I hope they find more success for every single person who was victimized by these monsters whom they admired and trusted.
--Michael Walsh
It's great that you are getting thoughts from this post as well as from our argument made at this place.
Posted by: beeoptions | November 19, 2013 at 20:27
It's too bad that nocita will never be convicted in court! Because His actions will always be "alleged" rather than legally proven. Can't you still take these perps to court? When journalists write about people like esther hatcield miller and mary gallagher they have to call them "alleged victims" rather than the "victims" they really are and will always be. Go to court & make it legal!
Posted by: Sandy Mae | June 13, 2013 at 23:08
Here is the Father Michael Nocita file (incomplete, of course) but it will give the readers a sense of the CRIMES he perpetrated on minors. I have met several other victims of his that are NOT included in this file.
http://clergyfiles.la-archdiocese.org/files/Nocita,Michael.pdf
Posted by: Esther Hatfield Miller | February 06, 2013 at 09:19
Read his file (which is now open) and you will see a small sample of his crimes against young women. There are so many victims, including myself, who never spoke up or brought charges against him. When I read the accounts of those who did complain, I see that he used the same lines and "moves" on all of us. He was a selfish jerk who got off on getting young girls to fall for him. The fact that church leaders were aware of this and allowed it to continue is disgusting.
Posted by: Grace | February 02, 2013 at 20:59
It is laughable when some post on here that they "know Fr Mike couldn't have done this or that". All you can attest to is what he did/didn't do to YOU. You cannot know what he did to anyone else. I know what he did to me in 1978/1979 while at Mary Star of the Sea parish in San Pedro. That's enough for me to know what kind of man he is and that he belongs in jail. If you want to comment, you should only discuss what you know from your own perspective. But please, do not dare to say what you THINK he did/didn't do to anyone else. That is not possible for you to know. I know what happened in the back of his beige Honda...
Posted by: Karen | January 28, 2013 at 12:49
I know that michael Nocita did not commit these crimes. This has been a deliberate act of destroying his reputation.
Posted by: L | January 23, 2013 at 23:08
hey desertmoon....anyone over 18 is committing a crime if having sex with anyone under 18. It's the law. Most if not all of these girls were under 18. Besides the fact that a priest shouldn't be having sex, or kissing girls period! He used his position to influence young girls/ladies, whether horny or not...he's the adult and KNEW better. He continued to do it for years and I hope he goes away forever. I knew him and while I may have been too young for him or whatever, strong, i know he had an 8 yr affair with a girl at my high school. then dumped her for another high school girl. He's a textbook pedofile. spelling?
what sickens me is it is known that the bad priests are shipped around...most have gone to schools/churches in Mexico, very scary for them.
if they are caught, kick 'em out of the Catholic church!
one reason i've left the church, i am a Christian but will not follow in this cult that allows MAN/MEN to run the religion blind! Holy hell!
Posted by: in the legal know | September 06, 2012 at 09:42
And I am also very glad Lisa left him and has found love with someone else. She deserves happiness. The unfortunate part are his sons, who have to bear the burden of his tainted reputation.
Posted by: Nicolette | September 20, 2011 at 12:58
Sorry Kerry, I also went to Alemany while he was principal, and I am sad to say he had a sexual relationship with a friend of mine during that time....so unfortunately this IS true.
Posted by: Nicolette | September 20, 2011 at 12:56
Mike Nocita is, was and forever will be EVIL. The innocent catholic souls have suffered abuse of all types from Mike & other monsters.
"Clergy abuse is a form of interpersonal victimization that involves a high degree of relational and betrayal trauma. In some significant ways, it resembles incestuous abuse."
Just because it didn't happen to you personally kerry or your sister chris does NOT mean it did not happen. Afterall, what can a 3 yr. old assess - certainly not EVIL from Mike Nocita.
Posted by: hurt | July 30, 2011 at 15:28
I am so horrified to read all of this. I am a witness to the fact that Mike Nocita is and always has been a stand up guy. I have known him since i was 3 years old went to St.
Bridgets and also went to Alemany while he was there. I also know Ester Hatfield and that she is a very sad and lonely women who has made this all up. Mike is one of the most amazing people i have never known and if he were to have hurt a child i could have easily been one of them. He was a wonderful priest and would never have done any of thing things that this women is accusing him of just to make a dollar. Mike is a wonderful father to his two boys and shame on anyone who says otherwise. He is certainly not a danger to any children in this world and never has been.
I do know the truth Ester and you know that I know. You know nothing of the sort ever took place to you or to anyone else by Mike. I do feel for all the children and families that suffered by a member of the church. But,Mike was not one of them. The 35 years I have known him he has been a blessing to me, my family, and many others. He never once was inappropriate to me as a child growing up or to my sister but, only a respectable role model for me to look up to.
Posted by: Kerry | May 12, 2011 at 17:00
No need to ask... he's a smooth operator...smooth operator.
Posted by: Cindi | December 13, 2010 at 16:15
Jimmy, will you elaborate?
Posted by: curious George | November 22, 2010 at 04:28
Today michael nocita is continuing to prepetrate others in his business practices. Is he the evil one the prophecies describe?
Posted by: Jimmy Crakcorn | November 08, 2010 at 09:02
Mike Nocita was a scum bag of a priest. While a priest in the early 1980's, he wrote letters to me, a married woman. He spoke of the sacrafice he was making for god, by being unmarried, and I could do the same by giving myself to him. He was a sexual predator, conning young women. But, thankfully, I came to my senses before anything inappropriate.
Posted by: Kay | October 24, 2010 at 17:12
Hmmm... Are you secretly hoping he leaves his beautiful wife and wonderful children to come around to you? Hmmm... Not likely.
Posted by: Hmmm... You better go with plan B : - ) | August 11, 2010 at 23:50
Hmmm, I guess what goes around comes around.....
Posted by: blossom | May 14, 2010 at 23:24
Rumor: Are the Nocita's seperating?
Posted by: chickli | May 06, 2010 at 11:21
Fr. Nocita won't be cool when he's begging before god to account for his many crimes of molesting and sexually abusing minor girls & boys, regardless of their age. He will need ice water in HELL.
Posted by: sunshine | March 14, 2010 at 23:45
Mike was cool then and I think he is still cool now.
Posted by: piperpiano@aol.com | March 09, 2010 at 07:21
First of all, the "girls" that Mike Nocita "abused" were all old enough to make up their own minds about what they would or wouldn't do with him. Come on, people, these were high school girls. Most of these girls probably had to make these same decisions every weekend night with their boyfriends or dates. Yes, Mike was a priest and should have had better control of himself; however, believe me, no girl would have brushed off his advances.
Posted by: desertmoon | February 23, 2010 at 21:47
Why do people keep bringing up his wife? What part did she play in your abuse? Probably none. Stay on track people. This blog is about Father Nocita, not Michael Nocita and family. When you gripe about his wife, kids, and money you appear envious.
Posted by: Stick to the subject | February 12, 2010 at 00:12
This is all very enlightening. When I was converting, I was seduced by Mike Nocita, too. He was magnetic and handsome in a very sociopathetic way. He had a huge ego and prided himself for his intellect, constantly bragging about his accomplishments. I was an adult but a frail one. He almost destroyed my life, my Faith and my marriage. Instead I prayed harder and avoided priests except in the confessional and even then it was FAST. Pity the innocent priests who have their images sullied because of dirtbags like Mike. Pity his wife, when he robbed the cradle. He was her coach and principal.
Posted by: Met at the chancery 1988 | February 06, 2010 at 23:21
I'm sorry to report to all of those commenting in defense of this man. I, too, graduated from Alemany High School, class of 1989. During the 87-88 year, he was our principal. I know of at least 1 under age female that he had an inappropriate relationship with. To those of you that don't get it, this IS a crime. I also know that he suddenly disappeared from Alemany shortly after, as an accuser from another school in which this sick man worked came forward. Seems like convenient timing, doesn't it? None of us knew what accusations had been leveled against him then, but it all makes sense now.
Since he married and left the priesthood, I heard he has done very well for himself financially. The harsh reality is that most undeserving individuals fail upward in life. He will get away with what he's done... he's managed to fool his wife (who I also went to grade school with) into believing he's a decent and ethical human being. He is not. The facts don't lie, ladies and gentlemen. I can only hope there will be payback for him in the afterlife.
Posted by: January 7, 2010 | January 07, 2010 at 13:11
Sanitize this.
Posted by: Mary Catherine Gallager | June 30, 2009 at 23:17
where are mikes files? does the church have them to be sanitized or did they ever get sent to the attorneys?
Posted by: wondering | April 21, 2009 at 15:55
Oops... "Laura" and "laura" are not one AND the same. (It was a long day).
Posted by: Laura | April 17, 2009 at 10:32
Is that so? Well, I think you are far more evil. You continue to try to embarrass and hurt people over and over and over again with your clever words.
Why don't you use that energy to help yourself and others? There's got to be something you can do. Look around.
Is your miserable life still the fault of the Catholic Church? Grow up!
And I want to make it clear that "Laura" and "laura" are not one in the same.
Posted by: Laura | April 16, 2009 at 23:05
i hope that mike nocita doesn't pray - his prayers are hindered and only heard by satan
Posted by: laura | April 14, 2009 at 15:58
As a father and husband, Mike doesn't have a lot of idol time, he is busy taking care of his family. I'm sure he finds time to pray for the people he has hurt and ask the Lord for forgiveness. You should do the same.
Posted by: Laura | April 07, 2009 at 17:04
what does former father mike do with his idol time - dream of more victims????
Posted by: ito | April 05, 2009 at 15:58
is father mike nocita the one abusing chilidren.
Posted by: michael nocita | March 17, 2009 at 20:54
OF COURSE HE IS - THOSE EVIL PEDO'S DON'T STOP
Posted by: anon | March 16, 2009 at 09:53
is father mike still abusing minors?
Posted by: | March 02, 2009 at 08:24
I'm a guy, dude. I have no attraction to Father Mike.
Lex icon has a rad site on many topics, not just married priests.
it appears you were alone on valentine day too. Maybe we could meet and talk about other stuff, not just your fixation on a old married guy with kids and a wife.
yes? no? maybe?
Posted by: | February 15, 2009 at 18:41
Says the person who spends Valentine's Day evening checking websites about Father Nocita. -----v
Posted by: Karma | February 14, 2009 at 22:22
Wolfhound,
You're the creepy one. Why would you even look for Father Nocita on facebook? Do you want to become one of his "friends" and catch up on old times? I highly doubt he would waste his time on anything such as facebook or myspace. Find someone else to cyber stalk. Leave this man and his family alone.
Posted by: | February 14, 2009 at 18:51
This is creepy. I tried to see if Michael Nocita had a facebook page. I found a different Mike Nocita. His short friends list includes a Mike Baker.
http://www.facebook.com/people/Michael-Nocita/1464827605
Posted by: Wolfhound | January 16, 2009 at 10:07
The continuity is still there. All the comments are still there, but across the entire blog, I changed it so that the most recent comments are listed first. On some of the posts, like this one and on about the college football season, people had to click Next a dozen times to read the latest comment and respond to it. This way, the latest comments are right up front, and if you want to look at the older ones, you can still find them.
Posted by: lex icon | October 06, 2008 at 12:12
we loose the context of the postings with the new format. how about changing back to the old way for continuity?
Posted by: | October 05, 2008 at 00:56
not the fr nocita we knew
Posted by: | September 22, 2008 at 22:58
was fr. nocita in the documentary deliver us from evil?
Posted by: | September 16, 2008 at 22:12
I've switched formats to put the most recent posts at the top. That way you don't have to click your way through a bunch of pages to see the latest comments people posted.
Posted by: lex icon | September 15, 2008 at 17:57
if marriage has nothing to do with being a survivor of sexual abuse, why did you beg him not to go through with his ordination and be with you?
why were you devastated when he married someone else?
why have you married four times?
Posted by: | September 10, 2008 at 17:09
luxuria superbia acedia gula invidia ira avarice invidia ira invidia ira invidia ira...
Posted by: | September 10, 2008 at 10:55
esther has no intention of recovering from her mental illness. she has no intention of caring for the real victims of clergy sexual abuse.
esthers only intention is to destroy what she cannot have. by doing so, she destroys even more than she could ever imagine.
how sad that she wastes her life and chance for happiness now. her poor family
Posted by: | September 09, 2008 at 23:32
yes, his current wife is a victim also. marriage has nothing to do with being a survivor of a sexual crime.
Posted by: | September 09, 2008 at 22:36
the seven million dollar question. would you still feel like a victim had mike married you instead?
Posted by: | September 07, 2008 at 21:15
Steph,
I hope you heal as well. It seems that my attempts to help anyone brings about so much anger, it in turn causes more pain. That is not my intention and I apologize for that. I guess I do not understand the magnitude of what any of you feel. I am not Catholic, Jewish, a therapist, or even a resident of CA. I'm just an average gal who thought she could help sweep up some of the clutter in the healing renovation process. I now see that is not the case. It's time for me to take another break from all of this, probably a permanent one. Since no one wants to see or hear the word "Peace", I'll just wish you all well.
Cheers :-)
Posted by: | September 07, 2008 at 15:15
this is steph and mike also abused me, i didn't get any money as i didn't want to go through that legal hell. i want other bloggers to know that mike did do sexual abuse and good for SNAP and VOTF who have brought attention to this terrible issue.
Posted by: | September 06, 2008 at 17:17