Cool: going to see all 119 Bowl Division football teams play football. Not cool: the 32-year long chase is described by your wife as "the one thing" you truly love. What an idiot.
Awesome: It's beginning to look like vigabatrin is the finest drug to come along in a long, long time. It aids in preventing seizures; it cures addiction; and it causes significant weight loss in obese creatures. As long as it doesn't cause heart attacks or penis detachments, it could be a big seller.
Rich: John McCain has so many houses, he can't answer a reporter's question about how many houses he owns. Some people think this makes him too elite and out of touch to be president, but I say let him who can actually keep track of how many houses he owns cast the first stone.
Pathetic: Tampa Bay does not deserve a baseball team. Sporting the best record in baseball, they host the team with the next-best record in baseball, in mid-August, and they can only sell 19,157 tickets. That's less than half-capacity.
Delusional: Mark Spitz, whose 1972 swimming records wouldn't be good enough to even make the Olympics this year, says that Michael Phelps would not have been able to beat him in his prime. Sorry, Mark, but the water hasn't changed over the years, and the swimsuit technology doesn't explain the difference. It probably has a lot more to do with Phelps's his freakish upper-body muscles, short legs, huge feet and hands, and that 6' 7" wingspan that you never had.
Unnerving: Does anyone other than me think that Joseph Edward Duncan III looks like the evil twin of the late professor Randy Pausch?
Scary: You can be falsely accused of raping a child, and the prosecutor will argue that your DVD collection of Star Wars movies, Harry Potter films and some Little House on the Prairie collections should be considered “non-erotic pornography.”
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