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TIL That Native Americans and Northern Europeans Are Closely Related

Using genetic analyses, scientists have discovered that Northern European populations descend from a mixture of two very different ancestral populations, and one of these populations is related to Native Americans.

So as it turns out, my native American heritage and my European heritage are the same, just different paths & timing

Earthquake and Tsunami

The earthquake that struck Chile this morning has an estimated magnitude of 8.8. This is almost 100 times stronger than the quake that destroyed much of Haiti earlier this year. This is comparable to the deadly 1960 Chile earthquake that measured 9.5 Mw and 8.6 Ms (surface magnitude). That quake produced a 10.7 meter tsunami that devastated Hawaii's Big Island. This quake is likely to have a lower surface magnitude than that 1960 quake, and the waves generated by this one are less severe than the ones in 1960, but this is a stunningly powerful earthquake and a very dangerous tsunami.

The entire Pacific region is now under tsunami warnings and advisories. If I was in Hilo or anywhere along the windward coast of the Big Island, especially less than 20 feet higher than mean high tide, I would move to higher ground with my favorite mobile possessions immediately. If I was on the windward side of Maui, I would do the same. I worry that the Keanae Peninsula will be scoured clean again. Hilo could get waves as high as 8 feet, according to the latest estimates (earlier estimates were as high as 5 meters).

This is not a possibility. The tsunami is in the Pacific and is definitely going to hit Hawaii. The first wave is expected at 11:05 a.m. local time (1:05 p.m. PST). A good livestream can be seen here: http://www.hawaiitsunami.com/. The Pacific Tsunami Museum's webcam can be viewed here: http://www.tsunami.org/hilobaycam.html. Local TV news coverage can be seen here: http://www.ustream.tv/cbsnews.They are evacuating the resort where my family spent our summer vacation. Guam and American Samoa are also very much in danger.

Here in California, we are under a tsunami advisory.

A TSUNAMI ADVISORY IS IN EFFECT WHICH INCLUDES THE
COASTAL AREAS OF CALIFORNIA - OREGON - WASHINGTON - BRITISH
COLUMBIA AND ALASKA FROM THE CALIFORNIA-MEXICO BORDER TO
ATTU ALASKA...

PERSONS IN TSUNAMI ADVISORY AREAS SHOULD MOVE OUT OF THE
WATER... OFF THE BEACH AND OUT OF HARBORS AND MARINAS.

TSUNAMI ADVISORIES MEAN THAT A TSUNAMI CAPABLE OF PRODUCING
STRONG CURRENTS OR WAVES DANGEROUS TO PERSONS IN OR VERY NEAR
WATER IS IMMINENT OF EXPECTED. SIGNIFICANT WIDESPREAD INUNDATION
IS NOT EXPECTED FOR AREAS IN AN ADVISORY. TSUNAMIS ARE A SERIES OF
WAVES POTENTIALLY DANGEROUS SEVERAL HOURS AFTER INITIAL ARRIVAL
TIME. ESTIMATED TIMES OF INITIAL WAVE ARRIVAL FOR SELECTED
SITES IN THE ADVISORY ARE PROVIDED BELOW.

LA JOLLA-CA      1202  PST FEB 27  YAKUTAT-AK       1619 AKST FEB 27
SANTA BARBARA-CA 1231  PST FEB 27  KODIAK-AK        1628 AKST FEB 27
SAN FRANCISCO-CA 1326  PST FEB 27  SAND PT.

Orange County should start seeing an influx of water between noon and 12:15 p.m. South facing beaches and harbors will be affected more significantly. The waves are expected to be no higher than 3 feet.

A Light Quake Month Comes to an End

This morning's OC Register included an article entitled "Fault that threatens OC might announce its quakes." Eight hours later, we got hit by a 5.8 magnitude quake near the border of Orange County and San Bernardino County. No announcement, of course. To the contrary, the Register's science guy posted this article a couple of days ago:

July is turning out to be one of the quietest periods for seismic activity in the recent history of Southern California. From July 20-26, the region recorded only one quake that measured 3.0 or larger. And that event was a minor temblor northeast of Yucaipa. Orange County didn’t record a single event of 2.0 or larger. Much of the time, Southern California experiences 3-4 quakes measuring 3.0 to 3.9 and a 4.0 or larger event isn’t unusual. There’s no verifiable evidence that the region is going through a lull prior to a large event.

They were originally calling this morning's quake a 5.8, but I was about the same distance away from the 5.9 magnitude Whittier Narrows quake in 1987, and although this was a pretty strong jolt, I remember the Whittier quake being much stronger. Some agencies are revising the magnitude down to 5.4, which does not surprise me a bit.

From my own memory, and from where I was when they hit, the strongest Southern California earthquakes I can recall are:

1. The 1994 Northridge quake 6.7 (about three hours before, we were talking about moving our TV, in case there was an earthquake)
2. The 1987 Whittier Narrows 5.9 (I was nearby in La Mirada at the time)
3. Today's Chino Hills quake 5.8 (?)
4. The 1979 New Year's Day quake 5.2 (occurred while USC was beating Michigan in the Rose Bowl)
5. The 1992 Landers quake 7.3 (far away, but very strong)
6. The 1999 Hector Mine quake 7.1 (also far, but also strong)

I don't really remember the 1971 Sylmar quake (6.6) that well. I was four years old, and I vaguely remember the excitement, but my recollection is not clear enough to compare it to any other quakes I've experienced.

My Favorite Scientists

My two favorite scientists are Michio Kaku and Kate Hutton.

Herpes or Cancer. You Can't Have Both?

Here's exciting news: herpes might kill cancer cells. Perhaps Katie Holmes will live forever.

The Return of Neanderthal?

Researchers studying Neanderthal DNA say it should be possible to construct a complete genome of the ancient hominid despite the degradation of DNA over time. Surprisingly, the method of obtaining the DNA does not entail a hypodermic needle in the arm of former NBA player Mark Eaton.

Sleepless Nights Affect Moral Judgments

According to this story, I am about to make some bad moral decisions. In related news, we rocked out at the Sham Rock festival last night. The Young Dubliners kicked ass, as always. I might try to post some pretty awesome photos later.

The Pillars of Creation Are Gone

Scientists now believe that the famous Pillars of Creation, photographed by the Hubble telescope, were destroyed some 6,000 years ago, and that in another 1,000 years, we'll get to watch it happen. In related news, there might be intelligent creatures 1,974 light years away with powerful telescopes trained on the Earth, who are getting ready to watch the crucifixion of Christ. In fact, if we can find some planet with a really glossy mirrored surface that is in the right place, lined up just right and about 987 light years away, we might be able to watch it, too. So far, science has not yet found such a reflection in the universe, but there's no reason not to look.

National Park Service Defies Alleged Requirement To Conceal Grand Canyon's True Age

This story amused me. According to The Huffington Post:

Due to pressure from Bush Administration officials, the National Park Service is not permitted to give an official age for the Grand Canyon. Additionally, a book claiming the Grand Canyon was created by Noah's flood is for sale at the National Park's bookstore.

The problem I have with this story is that it broke on December 29, 2006. Coincidentally, I woke up inside the Grand Canyon National Park on December 29, 2006. And I took my wife and daughters to the park visitor's center on December 29, 2006. The visitor's center must not have gotten the memo, because the displays, the handouts and the rangers all told us the same thing: the canyon is about five to six million years old.

If I was an Old Testament literalist/creationist, that would have made me mad, or so I'd imagine.

Sea Life on Mars?

There are people who look at this NASA photo of the surface of Mars and see seashells. Do you?

Explain This One

From the Associated Press:

"Leading astronomers" declared today that Pluto is no longer a planet. We are down to eight. Why? The new criteria for being called a planet require that it be "a celestial body that is in orbit around the sun, has sufficient mass for its self-gravity to overcome rigid body forces so that it assumes a ... nearly round shape, and has cleared the neighborhood around its orbit."

Hence, Pluto is automatically disqualified because its oblong orbit overlaps with Neptune's.

Yet, (and here's perhaps why they didn't let lawyers onto the committee) isn't it true that over the past 5 billion years or so, the neighborhood around Neptune's orbit has included Pluto, and therefore, Neptune and Pluto have mutually failed to "clear the neighborhood" around their orbits? If so, what makes Neptune a planet?

Evolution At Work

Someday, perhaps all of the people on earth will have three arms instead of two.

The Best News of The Year

Flu sprays are more effective that flu shots. If there is anything I hate more than getting the flu and dying from it, it is going to the doctor to get a shot. Hurray for flu sprays!

Unamazing Numerical Discoveries

I got an email the other day that said:

Personally, I would like to know who came up with this and why that person is not running the country.

1. Grab a calculator. (you won't be able to do this one in your head)
2. Key in the first three digits of your phone number (NOT the area code)
3. Multiply by 80
4. Add 1
5. Multiply by 250
6. Add the last 4 digits of your phone number
7. Add the last 4 digits of your phone number again.
8. Subtract 250
9. Divide number by 2

Do you recognize the answer?

[It's your telephone number.]

Here is another amazing trick:

1. Grab a calculator.
2. Key in the first three digits of your phone number (NOT the area code)
3. Multiply by 120
4. Add 5
5. Multiply by 250
6. Add the last 4 digits of your phone number
7. Add the last 4 digits of your phone number again.
8. Add the last 4 digits of your phone number one last time.
9. Subtract 1,500
10. Add the last 250.
11. Divide that number by 3

Do you recognize the answer?

It's a compicated way of saying, "take the first three digits of your phone number, multiply it by 1,000, and then add the last four digits of your telephone number. You will end up with --- your phone number!"

I might have too much time on my hands, but it only took about a minute to come up with the second formula.

And I thought I'd never use algebra in my adult life...

The Weather Forecast Has Eased a Bit

The weather forecast in Vero Beach is pretty normal now:

Partly cloudy with a slight chance of showers and thunderstorms, mainly this evening. Low 74F. Winds E at 10 to 15 mph. Chance of rain 30%.

Last week, with Hurricane Jeanne rolling in, this sterile, clinical forecast sent a tingle down my spine, even though I was home safe in California:

Tonight: Very windy with rain, heavy at times. Low around 75F. Winds SSE at 80 to 100 mph. Rainfall may reach one inch. Wind gusts could reach 125 mph.

Tomorrow: Frequent rain showers will be accompanied by heavy downpours and strong gusty winds at times. High near 85F. SSW winds at 70 to 90 mph, diminishing to 50 to 70 mph. Rainfall over two inches. Winds could occasionally gust over 100 mph.

Tomorrow night: Rain and wind early...then remaining cloudy with showers late. Low 77F. Winds SSW at 25 to 35 mph. Chance of rain 80%. Rainfall possibly over one inch. Rainfall totals approaching 10 inches locally.

They pretty much got it right, too.

Weather Talk

I'm still wondering about the broken seals. The reason? The weather.

It was strange enough that Jeanne decided to loop around off the coast of Florida after killing hundreds, maybe thousands, of Haitians. Now Ivan -- you remember Ivan, right? -- has made its way back south, into the eastern coast of Florida, across the peninsula, and back into the Gulf of Mexico where it has reformed into a tropical storm again. It's currently south of New Orleans and making plans to come ashore yet again as a tropical storm on the north shore of Texas, perhaps near Galveston.

Meanwhile, here in California, the sky is sharply blue, and the air is like oven air. It's close to the 100s with humidity in the teens or lower. We've arisen from bed twice in a row to strong winds from the desert. The hills above my home have had gale force gusts. I am pleasantly shocked that the hills are not alive with fire.

With all this unusual weather, I have stuff to talk about in polite society. It's less divisive than my usual Michael Moore is a miserable failure chit-chat.

The Earthquake Is Coming?

Do you remember that stir that arose in January when those UCLA scientists predicted a major earthquake in Southern California by September 5, 2004? They're down to barely more than 24 hours, and so far, not even a jiggle.

UCLA sucks. (Notre Dame, too)

My Backside, The Human Hovercraft

I recently learned this intriguing fact:

When one sits on a bench, one's buttocks do not actually touch the bench. Rather, they get so close to the bench that the electrons at the edge of one's buttocks are repelled by the electrons from the bench. Thus, one is actually levitating about one angstrom or so above the chair. Given this fact, one would think that the bench would feel softer, but it doesn't.

How far is is an angstrom? Expressed in meters, an angstrom is 1 x 10 to the -10th power, or 0.0000000001. That's just 10% of a nanometer, but it's a hundred picometers.

If you can figure out a way to work this knowledge into everyday conversation, you are probably my high school physics teacher. And you are a nun who has a crush on Sir Isaac Newton.

AMFs

So, the other day, I read a story about a woman my age who got busted in her home (near my home) for manufacturing methamphetamine. Police said neighbors were alerted to the operations by the telltale odor of a meth lab.

I wondered. "What does the telltale odor of a meth lab smell like?"

Like most of my problems, I googled it. And now, I know what a meth lab smells like. In fact, I now know how to make methamphetamine. No, I won't add a link.

I also learned that there are people out there who so badly want to try every different way of getting stoned that they are willing to consume massive quantities of nutmeg, which, reportedly, in the right manner and dosage, can give you 6 or 7 hours of a marijuana-like buzz, followed by 2 or 3 days of projectile vomiting and severe discomfort. Of course, if you measure incorrectly, you can give yourself a toxic reaction and no buzz, so you need to make sure your information is accurate and reliable.

Why do people do that? What's wrong with just drinking yourself into oblivion like a normal person?

When I want to get ripped, I eschew the nutmeg and go straight for the adios mother. There are many ways to make an adios mother, also known as an AMF. This is one of those blue beverages that looks like a wussy drink but will actually cause the floor to jump up and punch you in the nose.

There are many ways to make an AMF. Some people make it with 3/4 ounce shots of spirits, some people make it twice that. I even think I saw a recipe calling for 1/2 ounce shots. Some people use tequila. Some people use plain soda and lemon juice. But my favorite version of this beverage is:

1. Mix the following in a large glass: 1.5 oz. Vodka, 1.5 oz. Dry Gin, 1.5 oz. Light Rum, 1.5 oz. Blue Curaçao . Don't use Bacardi 151. It would be overkill.

2. Stir.

3. Add 6 oz. of Sweet & Sour Mix

4. Add 6 oz. of lemon lime soda (Sprite, Slice, 7-Up, etc.)

5. Stir again, then pour over ice, preferably in a hurricane glass.

It will taste like lemonade. And it will mess you up. Don't even think about doing a pitcher of the stuff.

If, for whatever reason, you don't like blue drinks, you can switch the soda with Mountain Dew, and pour a darker rum (Captain Morgan's) in place of the clear rum, and it will be as green as St. Patrick's Day beer. And it will mess you up.

Are You Coordinated?

If you do a Google search for "the strangest things I have ever encountered," you will find a bunch of people sharing this left brain, right brain trick:

While sitting in a chair, lift your right foot off the floor and make clockwise circles. While doing this, draw the number "6" in the air with your right hand. Your foot will change direction no matter how hard you try to prevent it.

I didn't believe it. I still don't. But I can't disprove it.

Ephebophilia

At the risk of sounding like a dirty old man (<--great link), I must say that I don't think Hilary Duff is hot. She's a cute little girl, but her songs -- especially Why Not? -- annoy me to no end. One cannot sing lame songs and be hot at the same time. Which is why Britney Spears should just shut up and use her lips for something other than singing.

I also never thought that the Olsen twins were hot. Every time I see them, even to this day, I picture the little baby girls with the droopy eyes that made it look like their mother drank too much.

However, if you think Hilary Duff is hot, or you thought Britney Spears, Leann Rimes or the Olsen twins were hot, even before their 18th birthdays, you might suffer from ephebophilia. Ephebophilia is an attraction to physically mature teens and young adults. Allegedly almost eighty percent of adult men admit to suffering from at least a mild case of same. Almost twenty percent falsely deny having the affliction. Though I wonder why it is classified as an affliction.

An ephebophile who looks but doesn't touch might be harmless, but trust me when I tell you not to get mixed up with an erotophonophile, e.g., Kenneth Bianchi and Ted Bundy.

I Hope You All Fail

I thought this story was worth passing along. Think of it as a reading comprehension test.

While at the funeral of her own mother, a young woman met a man whom she did not know. She thought he was amazing, so much her dream man that she fell in love with him immediately; but she never asked for his number, which she deeply regretted.

A few days later the girl killed her own sister.

Here is the quiz. One question, worth 100 points. Assuming no facts other than what is written above, tell me:

What was her motive in killing her sister?

Give it some thought, then click Comments to read the answer.

California Baby Hurricanes

The forecast for tonight is heavy rain and heavy winds. It's not going to be a hurricane or anything, but it looks pretty nasty. Here in Southern California, if the forecast calls for anything more than a tenth of an inch, the local news stations all go on "Storm Watch" mode, sending reporters out into the rain to bring us the latest word on nature's fury. The coverage is usually pretty weak.

I am quite impressed, however, with the news guys in Florida and North Carolina and such places who go out in the middle of hurricanes to broadcast live. I'd bet a month's pay that a news reporter who did a live shot during a hurricane would get monster ratings if he flew away and disappeared beneath the surf. I would watch over and over again.

I wouldn't want to see a hurricane in my town, but I think it would be interesting to experience a hurricane just once. In particular, I think it would be fun to drive through a category two hurricane with a 100 mile per hour tailwind, and then accelerate to 100, stick my face out the window and see if my hair got messed up.

I'm going to put that on my list of things to do before I die. But I'm going to save it for last. Just in case it doesn't go as well as planned.

The Dog Wins

The philosophy of "an eye for an eye and a tooth for a tooth" is an effective way of maintaining order and obedience in human societies. It doesn't work with dogs, though, at least, not in all instances.

My dog barked at me. I barked back. She cocked her head to the side and stopped barking. For about a minute.

My dog pounced on me and got me dirty, so I pounced on her and got her dirty. She stopped pouncing. For about ten minutes.

My dog nipped at me, so I bit her back. She stopped biting. Maybe for good.

My dog shit on a wall inside my house.

Thus, endeth my experiment.

Science Prediction for 2004

Last March, researchers published their discovery that prostate removal surgery reduces penis length by as much as 15%.

This March, researchers are going to publish their discovery that surgery to add additional prostates can increase penis length by as much as 15% per additional prostate.

I Have Seen The Past, And My Future Is Not In It.

If I could go back in time, one of the first ten things I would do is go to Dallas and stand on the grassy knoll as President Kennedy's motorcade went by, just to see for myself what really happened. I recently looked over some pictures of the grassy knoll that fateful day.

I was not in any of the pictures.

This probably means that I will never invent time travel.